Women Supporting Women

Hi Guys! Welcome back to another episode of ‘What’s Right With Life, Empowerment Talk’ with Jodie Baudek. And, I think you guys met Michelle before, I know you did. So, I want to talk about ‘girl power.’ It’s absolutely beautiful. Michelle would you like to introduce your self?

Michelle: Hi, I am Michelle.

Jodie: Michelle Evans, and she rocks, she absolutely rocks. So what I want for us to talk about today is women supporting women. We have another friend who will be here in a little while, she is always late, so she is not here yet. But, it just a beautiful when women support and celebrate each other. I loved that one day, you called me and  you said about our friend, “Hey, she really needs women like you and your friends in her life,” and we have all been friends for years so we all have that sister bond. But, to be drawing in more people in because she is a very powerful women and there is a lot of other women who don’t support that. Really surround your self with people who just celebrate your greatness and want to build you up and not just take from you, but share with you, and give to you. So, what are some of your takes on that?

Michelle: Well, I think that, as women, we have to face jealousy a lot from other women. Even other men, I guess. If you are a powerful woman and you are successful and you are a good person and you have things that maybe somebody else wants. Sometimes women can be very catty and jealous. Throughout the course of my life, I think what I have realized is I want to surround my self with people that truly celebrate my success and know that I am in competition with them. But, rather we are just cheering each other on.  And, Jodie has been that person for me, I can’t say how many years thought right?  So, over the course of all those years, Jodie is one of my close knit friends that, I can come to and tell her, if I got a promotion. And know that she is not going to question it, or you know doubt it, or she is going to celebrate it with me. I think probably over the last five years, and I won’t say how old I am. But when I reached a certain age I started to thin out that circle. I was surrounding myself with people that I thought that could help me get ahead, or that could do something for me, I I looked out when I was out with. I realized I was starting to build this circle of people that didn’t really mean anything to me.  So as the years went on I really made a conscious decision to start thinning out that circle and only surround myself with women who I truly know care about and love me.

Jodie: That is huge guys. And I am not dissing women, that is not where I am going with that at all. It is just sometimes people are going through things, and so when you are having your celebration they are not celebrating with you. So, really attract and put it into your intentions, to attract women and things into your life, that want to celebrate no matter what they are going through. Michelle and I have shared a lot of ups and downs in life no matter where you are. We have had deep, deep conversations about things and there is no judgment whatsoever. “Okay, let me get this off my chest, okay I got it, thank you for still loving me no matter where I am in my life. Whether I am up here or down here or in transition.” I want to thank you for sharing your girls with me. I love kids. They are awesome and I thought it was really good, and again I am trying to teach women and girls of all ages. But, I am the only girl out of nine boys in my family. I had to learn how to be a boy, I have way more testosterone in me than most women. So when something happens, I say it, I am done, I am over it. Kind of like boys that go on the basketball court, duke it out and they are done and they never talk about it. Where women gather other women and talk about stuff. Knock your crap off and don’t do it anymore is basically where I am going with it. When she brings her girls in, in order for her girls to pay for yoga, because it has to be an energy exchange. I said “okay rather than mom paying for it, I want you to weekly report to me what you did nice. Did you talk to somebody at school that maybe you wont have talked to before, did you do something in the community, did you volunteer, so you are building up other people?” And it was so cool, they would come and tell me what they would do and stuff. It was just so heart warming, it was really warming to my heart. Michelle is really good at yoga, she was, she has been off for a couple of months. It was so cute, because, was it your 12 year old, which one did you bring in there, and it was like Mom, you are amazing.

Michelle: That was Hannah, that was my 18 year old.

Jodie: She comes in and Michelle is rocking out in class, class is packed. And she was like Mom, you are amazing. And, just to see her acknowledge how amazing you were, rather than even being in competition, because most kids are like Mom, I can do that. Exactly, so, it was getting them young to teach them that, and build them and I just think if we grab them young, we can really get away from a lot of the nonsense that goes on. Before you getting here we talked a lot about social media and this nonsense that has happened. What is some of your advice for women to not compare themselves and for kids. How to build themselves up?

Michelle: That is good question because I have a 14 year old and an 18 year old and both are completely engrossed in social media. And, I have had as many as mothers have had, experience with some bullying, somebody said something about this one, and this whole big Instagram war. And the thing that I try to teach my daughters is to be the bigger person. That probably my best advice for women with teenage daughters is just drill that into their heads from a very early age. And, I think when I was going through what I just mentioned before about thinking out my inner circle I involved my children in that. So, you know I would talk to my girls about my friends and what I like and didn’t like and to them it just felt like conversation with mom, like mom is really letting me into her life and we are just talking about regular things. But I had an ulterior motive and that was to let them see that my goal as I get older is to just have supportive people in my life and not worry about all the other stuff. I just try to be really diligent in teaching them that war with words never works, fighting back never works, just keep your head high, be a good person and surround your self with people that love and care about you. I think it has worked so far, they turned out pretty good.

Jodie: They have! One night we were out and I was at Michelle’s and it was late, and of course everybody wants to be at Michelle’s house and there were kids everywhere.

Michelle: Wait, let’s set the scene. I have very small, well not very small, a 2 bedroom apartment in Chicago and it’s a city apartment so it’s all of 900 square feet. And so there is not a whole lot of space and Lollapalooza came in June or July, or whenever that was and you know, Hannah had approached me and said, “Is it okay if we all stay at the apartment?” Eight girls! Jodie and I were stepping over bodies and people were sleeping on the floor and on the balcony and it was just insane. But, that is another thing I would probably suggest. I know more about teenagers than women, because I have had a lot of practice so far, but I think it is important that you allow that, that you allow those girls to come into your home, and to let them know what you will accept and not accept in your home.  And, kind of be diligent about the way they are treating each other. And if you do sense some tension or whatever, after they all leave then have that conversation. I noticed that so and so was being a little short with you and is she disrespectful and how do you feel about that? That seems to be work well. I can’t believe what I got my self into!

Jodie: I walked in and they were sleeping which tells you something.

Michelle: My bathroom looked like a tornado hit it.

Jodie: What I love is that Hannah, lifted her head up and she is like “Auntie Jojo” and put her head back down, completely safe, I know mom has me surrounded with some really great stuff. And I think that is something true, that parents really need to diligently do is, make sure that your kids feel really safe. Kids see and hear everything.

Michelle: And everything that I think I am saying about girls applies for women too. Everything you just said applies for us. I mean if we sense some something that is not right, we should be able to come to each other and say hey I notice that person what treating you poorly etc. I think that is important as we get older and to take that advice and that teaching that you give to your children and apply it to your friends as well.

Jodie: It is so true. So, I’ll just share another girl supporting girl story. We go out one night and we are all classy up sitting at the finest place. We decide to leave and just go for a ride and it was so fun, that we all loaded into our girlfriend’s car and we turned up Def Leppard and as loud as could be and had the windows rolled down and just waving to people and having a great time. We were allowing ourselves to embrace our inner child and have a great time and be silly and be fun, and be supportive and there was no judgment in it.

Michelle: No stress, just a bunch of girls being together and having fun.

Jodie: It was an awesome, awesome night. Two of the girls you guys had never even met and they were like, I can see why you love them so much. And you guys are like I can see why you love them. It is just bringing in positive energy. Having fun guys. I think what happens as we are on that road to go where we want to go in life, we get to dance. So, I want you to dance and have some fun. Guys, just find your self a huge network, a tribe that is awesome. So, I want your homework to be is, just surround your self with amazing tribe. Give me some feedback guys, like hey what you said kind of changed my life, or you know what your friendships, you know, support somebody and tag them on this. Hey you are part of my tribe, I love you. Things like that, and let’s just create this amazing network. You can tag men in here, absolutely, I love them, tag them all. But it’s just really a great way to create this amazing life, so what advice do you want to give?

Michelle: Homework, start to really focus on creating that tribe. Get rid of the relationships that are harmful or toxic, and again it could be men or women. But, yes surround your self with people that are really supporting, even if that is a group of five people. Really people that you trust and love and feel supported by. And, you will notice, immediately, at least I have, and I am still not done, a sense of relief and comfort, and satisfaction from really just having a group of real loving, supportive friends.

Jodie: I love you and appreciate you, bye!